Blogging is Masturbation too, Right? Or is it Exhibitionism?

     Let's talk about the proverbial elephant in the room.  Blogging is merely a 21st century form of the diary/journal placed on public display.

Well, by that definition, it's kind of like graffiti

    I'll confess, my relationship with the concept of diary/journal is a bit maligned.  It was one of those things you had to do as a child of my generation.  If you were female, it was called a 'diary' and it was often some hideous pastel color complete with a cheap, sorry excuse for a lock that was supposed to protect the clandestine nature of your most profound secrets, i.e. the boys you liked, because that is all little girls are supposed to think about...sugar and spice and everything nice.  

But not real leather.  Or is that suede?  How would I know?  It's like when people refer to areas of the body like 'flank.'  I don't know a flank from a loin from a filet.  I do know the difference between tempeh, seitan, and tofu, however.

I always insisted on the seemingly gender-neutral "journal."  But it still was an awkward, forced exercise that definitely smacked of masturbation in nature.

Note: If all this talk of masturbation lacks context for you, please see my previous blog post "Insert Inspirational Cliche Here"   

Fast-forward more years than I care to admit (I was alive when the object in the first photo was still erect) and I now have a blog.  Have I forayed into the arena of exhibitionism?  Well, that would only be the case if someone read my blog.  

Cue the crickets...

I can't help but feel like random musings or secret loves or whatever people deem worthy of journalstuff is an impractical pursuit at best and narcissistic at worst.  I tire of hearing how therapeutic journaling is, how cathartic (Can somebody say...masturbation?).  Then I stumbled across this opinion article in Time and started to revisit some of these notions.  You are asked to think of the activity in the context of a historian looking for truth.  Truth is raw and ripe; unpolished and unedited.  Uncensored, even.  After years pass, we are able to give a more sanitized and presentable account of our "truth", filtered through our biases stemming from our own personal narrative and our sense of meeting others' expectations.  History is fraught with dishonest representations and perhaps it is our duty to help provide a candid, fresh account of these unforgettable happenings (or should we call them not-happenings?).  I may even have some selfish motivation; I think I want to write down some observations and sensations just so I remember, so I can put the future in correct perspective.  What it was like to feel a new level of social awkwardness as the etiquette changed day to day based on new findings.  What it was like to stay away from people to protect them.  What it was like to meditate on Zoom.  What it was like in the hospital without visitors.    

    But as soon as we commit observations and sensations to word, or merely to think these things, we lose their essence, their immediacy.

"The first rule of Fight Club is: you do not talk about Fight Club"

But we might have a better chance of remembering and telling the story we need to tell.

       

  

    

Coronapocalypso

The empty roll...a symbol of our times?

     

     I make a solemn promise to you right now.  I'm not going to mention the 

C-word at all in this post.  Not a Peep, despite tomorrow being Easter.

I'm not going to utter the P-word either.

Nor the V-word.

        Instead, I am going to share a recipe with you.  

Did you snatch the last loaf of bread?

Fresh Bread (with Make-Ahead Dough)

2 cups warm water

1 tsp Active Dry yeast

pinch of Kosher salt 

4 cups room temperature flour

1.  Combine flour and salt.  Add yeast and let sit at least 30 seconds.

2.  Mix with water and stir until uniformly wet

3.  Cover bowl with aluminum foil and let rise at room temperature for 2-5 hours.

4.  Refrigerate.

5.  When you're ready to make fresh bread, grease a loaf pan and put dough inside.  Let it sit at room temperature for a half hour.

6.  Preheat oven to 450 degrees Fahrenheit.  Sprinkle dough with flour and drizzle with olive oil.  Stick it in the oven for a half hour.